Gossip Girl- G.G

"All relationships are a business. Sometimes if your lucky you have love as a bonus."

Holy Crap... No pun intended. After a mediocre season of Gossip Girl I fell into this trap of thinking I could figure out exactly what the writers were trying to do. That is until I watched this very episode. It was a goddamn roller-coaster ride with twists and turns every 5 minutes. What you thought was going to happen one minute flipped 360 and you were left breathless and utterly astonished. Honestly, I don't even know where to begin all I know is that there hasn't been a Gossip Girl episode thus far that has been so brilliantly produced. When church bells rang, the mayhem began.... scheming and blackmailing at full force. And in the end, a new Gossip Girl even made her way to town. 

You get what you deserve Blair Waldorf, or should I say Princess Blair. When you have so many people that care about you and want whats best for you, maybe you should take their advice? You can't say they didn't try, because everybody did. Blairs mother physically went to Chuck's loft and begged him to come stop the wedding. Serena tried to talk Blair out of making the biggest mistake of her life. Hell, even Georgina tried to help Blair out (in her own and conniving way). Yet Blair always has to have everything go her way. Chuck Bass poured his heart out for the up-teenth time this season only to be shot down over and over again. Here is a guy that has fought continuously for your love and a guy you admitted to being in love with despite the fact that your getting married to someone else. Blairs logic in all of this just did not follow suite. Than Gossip Girl tried to interrupt, since Chuck didn't have the decency to stop this shindig. And after that embarrassing interruption at the church why the hell would Louie even take Blair back? Is that even a legit marriage and a legit relationship if he can forgive all of that in a couple of seconds? The only obvious answer in all of this was Blair was so convinced she was right, nothing could have changed her mind... Except a rude wake up call that is.... 

As a sucker for weddings, I was repulsed by the cake eating scene that the newly married couple shared Not until the last dance was everything completely obvious. As the beginning of the episode alluded to this years royal wedding of Kate and William, the ending of it followed in his mothers footsteps, at least partially. Princess Diana was as some say trapped in a loveless marriage and that was exactly what Prince Louie was doing to Blair.  Prince Louie who was kind, loving, and warm-hearted suddenly turned into a complete beast. The love that they once shared was gone and that was fairly obvious by the icy glare he gave her. He had deceived Blair but only after she deceived him. 

I know one rule of royalty is that they must save face, but wouldn't it just be bolder of him to tell Blair to hit the curb and distance himself from this mess, letting her live the life she wanted with the guy she loved?  The only thing that will result from this arrangement is that Blair will realize she finally loves Chuck and a whole story will emerge of how she must escape from this legally binded "business deal." But will she try to go back to Chuck or find love in lonely boy's arms. Either way, until her prince gets bored and wants a divorce, she is bound to him. And he is going to want revenge for all the crap she put him through. Smile for the photographers B, your fairy tale has just come true. Be careful what you wish for because you just might get it. Are divorces for royalty even legal?

Speaking of lonely boy, Poor S. Not only has she screwed up her previous relationships with Dan but now she lost him to her best friend. I mean when Blair was in trouble the obvious choice would be to call Chuck, but she didn't she called Dan. I loathe a Dair relationship beyond anything more than a friendship. As S waited to talk to Dan after confessing she loved him (way to freak the guy out S) Dan was busy saving his damsel in distress. It seems that every guy falls in love with Blair and Serena gets pushed to the curb. I guess we could have seen this coming from the Audrey Hepburn and Marilyn Monroe montage at the beginning when Audrey steals Humphries, but still, doesn't Blair have enough on her mind? Even Georgina treated Serena's life as she made her epic exit... well until next time. Speaking of, some foreshadowing was played in this episode. Georgina has been MIA from New York since like season 4, how the hell would she know everyone's twisted little secrets, even the fact that Serena is in love with Dan. She might be observant but no one can be that observant, I mean lonely boy didn't even catch on!!!! So I guess as shocking as the revelation was, if you were an intuitive watcher you wouldn't have been so shocked.

No, Just Kidding it was still the biggest twist in Gossip Girl history. We waited 5 years to find out that GEORGINA, the jesus camp freak, was Gossip Girl. After everything church camp and tricking Dan into being Milo's father and trying to have Ivy kill herself at some party (and Ivy by the way missed the wedding of the century), Georgina has been our beloved Gossip Girl. I've had such mixed feelings about Georgina in the past few seasons, but one thing she never lacked was her sense of dark, twisted humor.  And although chaos was minimal when GG was gone, she made her comeback in a big way. I doubt this was the last we've seen of lady G. You know what they say, the one that you least expect will be the one to take you by surprise. 

Memorable Quotes

• Gossip Girl: Once upon a time Princess B was a virgin queen and her king was named Archibald. Who would have thought that in just 5 short years she could turn that headband into a tiara.
• Gossip Girl: But if you think I spent all my recent downtime reflecting what I've done in those same 5 years let me assure you that couldn't be further from the truth. I was just planning my comeback, so if I were you I'd watch this space, cause the new gossip girl is coming and what will my first post be? All I can say is you should probably pray I wont be writing about you.
• Dan: Once Blair and Louie say I do me and Serena can say I don't and go back to just being friends.
• Chuck: I'm sorry father I dont play those kind of games anymore.
• Georgina: A true American princess. The next Princess Diana. Don't these people do their research anymore?
• Guy: How do you expect to get into the wedding of the century? 
• Georgina: By joining forces with the centuries biggest wedding crasher.
• Georgina: Bless us father, I have a feeling were about to sin.
• Priest: Now who are you again?
• Georgina: The answer to your prayers.
• Georgina: Jesus owes me one.
• Nate: You know the worlds a mess when the most honest person we know is Chuck Bass.
• Chuck: If I were meant to stop the wedding there would have been some sign.
• Elainor Waldorf: All day long I had this feeling like I forgot something. And than I realized what it was. It's you!
• Elainor: So are you coming to stop this thing or what?
• Chuck: Don't marry him. Tell me I'm wrong and I'll leave. You can't because it should be us up there and you know it.
• Blair: You should find someone who loves you too.
• Chuck: I have she's standing right in front of me.
• Serena: Maybe the pact is just an excuse your using to protect yourself from the messiness and uncertainty of a life with the man you really love.
• Serena: I think I May have just done something really bad.
• Gossip Girl: If no one else is going to say it I guess I have too. The person who should be objecting isn't Chuck Bass but the bride herself.
• Blair: Of course I love you Chuck. I've always loved you. I love you more and more everyday if that's even possible to love someone that much.
• Georgina: Anyways whoever it was the weddings over now. See you at the next shinding. Ta-Ta.
• Blair: Its me. I made a horrible mistake and I don't know what to do. Help me please.

Time Moves Slow